It’s the most wonderful time of the year!
The Instagram-perfect Christmas tree, matching family pajamas, and Elf on the Shelf traditions are upon us.
It’s very easy to get sucked into the commercialism of the holiday season.
Not only do we get flooded with the emails and the radio and TV commercials, but now we have video ads and social media ads about all of the best deals and must-have gifts.
Those in the sales biz have heavily researched all of the best phrasing and language to get us to believe that we need more, more and more.
But we have a choice to block out the noise.
One of the most important things we can do during the hustle and bustle of the holiday season is to remember our most important relationship — and look to each other.
Focus on your strengths this season
Just because Pinterest tells us that our house and holiday table should look a certain way, doesn’t mean we have to comply.
What are the parts of the holidays that bring you the most joy?
If you love a fancy decorated table for the holidays, go and do that.
Is it the from-scratch food? Then focus on the recipes and make them your centerpoint of the day.
Do you love the smell of a fresh-cut tree and greenery? Find ways to decorate your house with the smells that trigger nostalgia and treasured memories.
Are fancy gifts wrapped with ribbon and bows your thing? Gifting something beautiful can be just as fun as what’s inside the box.
Or does shopping small matter the most to you? Ask your friends for names of their favorite small businesses and buy local this year. You’ll be making a difference to real people in real time.
The point is, we don’t have to be everything to everyone. Decide what matters most to you, and put your time and effort there.
Decide what traditions matter most
There are an abundance of memory-making opportunities during the holiday season.
But you can’t do it all.
You and your spouse have to decide what matters most for your family.
Maybe it’s watching the city tree lighting. Running a family 5K jingle. Making wreaths at your local greenhouse. Meeting Santa at the mall. Baking holiday cookies for neighbors. Watching the Nutcracker at the ballet. Donating to a local food pantry. Drinking eggnog while decorating the tree.
Those are all worthy activities.
It’s too much to expect of yourself to do it all plus wrap curated gifts, send beautiful holiday cards, ship presents to out-of-town family, and say yes to every holiday event you’re invited to without losing your marbles.
Set your holiday calendar with your most important traditions, and work backward from those anchor points.
If you get into the crazy weeks around the holidays and feel like you have margin, you’re doing it right.
It’s important to remember it’s a season of peace and joy.
Manage the stress by intentionally slowing down
Even when you’re in the thick of holiday shopping and parties and rushing from one activity to another, it’s vital that you make time for your spouse.
Whether you snuggle on the couch and watch Christmas movies, drive around to see Christmas lights, or sit in front of the tree to catch up, hold space for each other.
It’ll keep you centered and help you find balance during stressful times.
Your significant other is the one who knows you best.
They are best equipped to fully understand you, identify what triggers you, and love you through it.
Being intentional about finishing your day together is important so you don’t lose sight of each other.
Your relationship shouldn’t take second place to the holidays.
Give your spouse the gift of your uninterrupted attention this Christmas season.
You’ll both find joy in slowing down and discovering ways to manage the stress together. Choose what matters most.
Don’t fall for the lie that you have to do all of the things.